Sunday, May 4, 2008

I Will Possess Your Heart...And Stress You Out

Everything was rather uneventful until yesterday when by the power of Greyskull, everything went to shit. Ok, so maybe that's exaggerating, but I'm starting to sweat the end of the month.

I was already kind of up in the air about what I was doing until August/September (my GTFO out New England due date) but I was vaguely certain that I'd be sticking around Providence working and taking Spanish II at a local community college. I was going to probably move out of my apartment into a cheaper one or drag Ashley's ass down to Providence and split rent with me. Christian was going to stick around his apartment til August 1st when his roommate moves to CT for a job on a cruise ship, he'd keep working at the restaurant and save up money to pack up and move with me, where ever we may end up going.

Now yesterday he informs me that his landlord SOLD their apartment and have until the end of the month to move out. He says that he's found an apartment in Warwick, about 20 min from me but 2 min from his job, but the lease is 1 year and he doesn't want to sign it. It's going to be a hell of a time to find a place that's month to month or has extremely flexible lease terms without paying a ridiculous amount of money so he's stuck. I have been toying with the idea of him moving in here and us getting a 1 bedroom and splitting the $1200/month rent, but his roommate would be left high and dry (although I suppose he could move in with his girlfriend or find a cheap 1 bedroom). We wouldn't really be saving up enough money for when we move, so that's a limited option.

The other option: My mom, without yet meeting Christian, told me that we are "more than welcome" to move into their place in NH and live in the furnished basement. We wouldn't have to pay rent, utilities, buy food - nothing. We can live there over the summer, get jobs, and would save a shitload of money. While it seems like a good idea, I don't want Christian to feel as though I want him to uproot his life down here, quit his job, and bounce two states away for 3 months. I'm going to talk everything over with him tonight when I see him, but I'm pretty certain that's what my plan is going to be, and I'll try to haul my ass down to Providence as often as I can to see him, but I know it's going to suck. My fear is that it's going to end up like it did with the Redneck last year; granted Christian would never cheat on me or be shady, but I know that even a few hours of distance can really screw things up. Christian hates the idea of him moving 20 minutes away to a new place, so it's going to be so hard for him to be 2 hours away.

A small part of me realizes that this would all be so much easier and less stressful if I was single and didn't have anyone else to factor in (besides Ashley since we're pretty much attached to the hip). I'd move home, get my job back at the Canada place, save up roughly around $6,000 and then figure out where to go from there. But now with Christian it's a 'we' situation. It's funny though - he told his roommate, who's torn about leaving his girlfriend of 6 months to take the cruise ship job, to not even consider her a factor; to just do what he wants to do, and yet here we both are, together for almost 2 months and we're both stressing out how to work things out for the both of us. I asked Christian about that last week and he said it's because he can see us together 5 years from now whereas his roommate can't do the same. Then you have factor in us knowing each other for a year and a half, fooling around for a year, and then "dating" for 3 months before we made it official. I just don't want things to get all screwed up when they're going so well.

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